22 January 2014

Pitch Wars ALT: VB-10 - STORM OF MAGIC

MENTOR: Jen Swann Downey
ALTERNATE: Meredith Mansfield
WORD COUNT: 57,000

PITCH: Everyone believes usable magic died in the Great Mage War along with its practitioners. Then a violent storm infects eleven-year-old Rell with leftover magic which threatens to kill him. In a world now hostile to magic, Rell's survival depends on finding a mage to help him--one who doesn't want him dead.

At the flicker of green light, Rell raised his head from the row of corn he'd been weeding and glanced across the open plains. Maybe it was nothing, just a trick of the light or a reflection. Everything was some shade of green or yellow in that direction except the line of clouds on the horizon.

In the next row over, Da said, "Back before the war, we'd have had a mage spell the seeds before we planted. Then the corn would grow faster than the weeds and choke them out. Things were easier then."

Rell grimaced. Once Da got started on what things were like before the war, he could go on all day. Weeding the fields was boring enough without that. "Yeah, well, all the mages are dead," he muttered under his breath. He glanced over toward the blackened stumps of what used to be the family's orchard. And a good thing, too. He knew better than to say that out loud, though.

 Rell caught another flash out of the corner of his eye. Orange. He'd swear to it. There were a lot fewer things on the plains at this time of year that could be that color. He jumped to his feet, brushing the heavy clay soil from his hands and tossing his head to get the unruly brown hair out of his eyes.

A bolt of red lightening forked down as Rell watched. He waited for it, but no thunder followed the flash.


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  2. Tightly paced, artfully imagined, very accomplished writing, drew me right in! Do take a look, agents...