Cookies and Hugs Might Not Fix the World, But I'll Do My Best!

There is so much darkness in the world today. Hatred, violence, intolerance … and hiding away in a bubble of ignorance (as tempting as that may sound) doesn’t help. After all, “Bad men need nothing more to compass their ends, than that good men should look on and do nothing” (JohnStuart Mill). It’s absolutely vital, now more than ever, to stand up for the things we believe in with courage and conviction.

But I’m learning that there are a lot of different ways to stand up, and it’s okay if my stance doesn’t look exactly like yours. We all have different abilities and strengths. I may not be as tall as you, or be able to carry the same kind of load. Some people might be able to reach greater distances in a single leap or run farther before they have to stop to rest. But we all have something to contribute.

I’ve been feeling terribly guilty for months, because I’m just not doing enough. Even on my tiptoes, I can’t stand as tall as some of the giants I know.

I see my friends marching in rallies and making live broadcasts of their daily phone calls to senators and members of congress to make their voices heard.

I see other friends writing articles and blog posts and books that highlight Important issues to enlighten the world.

And I’ve felt like a gigantic failure, because I’m not Making A Difference. I can’t march because anger (even when rightfully directed at great injustices) literally paralyzes me (stupid brain tumor). And though I’m proud of the sweet, fluffy stories I tell, I may never write the kind of Important books my friends do.

Except …

There was the little Hispanic girl at the Gaithersburg Book Festival a couple of weeks ago who excitedly hugged my book and exclaimed “the princess looks just like me!” (I wish I had a picture, because the resemblance was uncanny. They even had the same glasses!) And maybe this little girl had never seen herself in a princess book before. But she stood a little taller as she walked away, clutching a bookmark and pin depicting the princess that looked just like she did.

Maybe it was important to her.

And I may not have the kind of strength that makes a hero, but I have arms that are great at giving hugs and ears that are highly skilled listening devices. I might not be able to confront the bullies on the playground, but I can definitely lift and support those who are being attacked. And I might not be able to fix everything, but maybe I can make one small corner of the world just a little bit better. And maybe that is important enough.

I will probably continue to feel guilty more days than not. By tomorrow morning, I will likely be once again feeling like my contribution isn’t good enough. Because, to be honest, there will never be a “good enough” until the good shines stronger than darkness, lifting those who have been beaten down to cower in the shadows. And I will never stop wishing that I could stand a little taller and reach a little farther and banish the bullies from the playground.

Maybe someday I will get there. At least, if I keep trying, I will get closer. But in the meantime, I will do what I can. And for now, I know I can do this:

I can look for the goodness in the people around me. I can acknowledge the beauty of those who might feel invisible, those who feel forgotten and neglected. I can be there to listen when someone needs to talk, and I can amplify the voices of those who stand a bit taller or reach a bit farther than I can. Those who have such Important things to say.

And I can spread sunshine in the ways I know how. With bubbles and fairy tales and chocolate sprinkles on top.

Cookies and hugs might not fix the evil in the world, but sometimes the little things are Important too.

Book Review: MY SISTER LIVES ON THE MANTELPIECE by Annabel Pitcher

 

MY SISTER LIVES ON THE MANTELPIECE by Annabel Pitcher follows the story of Jamie Matthews, who was only five years old when his sister, Rose, was killed in a terrorist bombing in London. He doesn’t really remember her at all, but she’s still a part of his daily life. In fact, her presence dominates the family. Rose “lives” in an urn on the mantelpiece, because Jamie’s father can’t bring himself to let go of his little girl. When Jamie’s mother leaves them for a man she met in her grief support group, and his father moves the rest of the family to the English countryside for a new start, Jamie feels like he’s lost in the shuffle. His father is drunk more often than not, his mother never calls or writes, and his sister, Jas (Rose’s twin), spends most of her time with her new boyfriend.

Jamie only has his new friend, Sunya, to rely on. But he has to keep the friendship a secret, because Sunya is a Muslim, and Jamie’s father hates all Muslims. He blames them all for the attack that killed his little girl.

Pitcher tells a captivating story of love and loss and mourning. As Jamie’s friendship with Sunya grows, he struggles to understand the grief that’s tearing his family apart and the prejudice that poisons his father’s world view.

This book is a great catalyst for opening conversations about death and loss as well as difficult discussions about hatred and prejudice.

Book Review: THE TRUTH ABOUT TRUMAN SCHOOL

I recently read an amazing book: THE TRUTH ABOUT TRUMAN SCHOOL, by Dori Hillestad Butler (2008). 

                Zebby and Amr want to write important articles for the school newspaper—articles about curriculum and student council elections and bullying.  When Mrs. Johnstone, the newspaper’s faculty advisor, refuses to approve any articles except “rah, rah, isn’t our school great?” pieces, Zebby and Amr decide to create their own web-based newspaper: truthabouttruman.com, where anyone can post articles and photos.  When someone starts using the site to bully a classmate, Zebby and Amr don’t know what to do.  They aren’t comfortable with the mean-spirited postings, but they aren’t sure if they should remove them from the site.  After all, their rules state that anyone can post to the site, as long as they’re telling the truth as they see it.  Before long, the true articles Zebby and Amr wanted to write are forgotten as truthabouttruman.com becomes a social hub for gossip, blurring the lines between truth and fiction, and the two friends must find a way to stop it before it’s too late. 

Weaving together the stories of everyone involved, Butler explores the truth about bullying, both online and in person and its devastating consequences.  Whether they’ve experienced the trauma of dealing with a bully, bullied someone themselves or simply stood by and watched as a classmate suffered, readers are certain to relate to this story.  It should be required reading for all middle school students, their teachers and parents.